“Now this is the commandment—the statutes and the rules—that the Lord your God commanded me to teach you, that you may do them in the land to which you are going over, to possess it, that you may fear the Lord your God, you and your son and your son's son, by keeping all his statutes and his commandments, which I command you, all the days of your life, and that your days may be long. Hear therefore, O Israel, and be careful to do them, that it may go well with you, and that you may multiply greatly, as the Lord, the God of your fathers, has promised you, in a land flowing with milk and honey.

Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.”

Deuteronomy 6:1-9

On a recent chilly night, I put on a pink hat (a…weird decision since my hair is purple), so my four-year-old daughter wanted to wear her pink hat. Our commonalities go deeper than headwear: She sways to music the same way I do, loves The Great British Baking Show the way I do, and on this weekend’s donut run, my husband said she dramatically sighed and said, just like her mother, “My nerves are shot.”

Though parenthood is far from formulaic, it’s still fraught with plenty of this kind of inadvertent copy-pasting. We experience a similar phenomenon as adults when we catch a glimpse of our reflection in the mirror or hear ourselves talk and think, “I am my mother!” Replication happens all the time with parents and their kids, and often the stakes are higher than pink hats and reflections.

I first learned this pre-parenthood. Back then, my husband was a student pastor, and I was a middle school writing teacher. We made efforts to not only minister to our students, but to come alongside parents, recognizing their role as the primary disciple-makers. Our most common takeaway in ministry issues was, “WOW! Parents matter.” Parental influence is special, nearly unmatched in its effectiveness.

Maybe that’s why my jaw dropped the first time I heard someone connect the Genesis command, “Be fruitful and multiply,” with the Great Commission, “Go and make disciples of all nations.” The connection between the two decrees matters because it reminds us that spiritual parenthood is a God-given responsibility in our homes and outside of them, and it reminds us that in a sin-soaked world where many are left un-parented and in which ALL parents need support, God commissions all believers to spiritual parenthood—whether or not they created any biological mini-me’s. We are all called to holy copy-pasting. Just as God created man and woman in his image, we’re invited to participate in the making of more image-bearers both by blood and by spirit.

Spiritual parenthood is God-work, sacred and as old as the earth itself.

That’s why we have to be careful we don’t shove the responsibility of discipleship onto others or heap the expectation onto the church establishment. Without a doubt, we personally are called to disciple our children, and often, we personally are called to disciple other children. From Creation to the Commission to the kids right in front of you, God is in the business of replication, and he has placed a personal call on each of us to participate.

For this reason, I’ve been working to adapt Simple Discipleship (my program for women to disciple other women) for mothers (spiritual or otherwise) to use with their daughters (spiritual or otherwise) ages 9-13. It’s designed to be simple but rich, intentional but easily referenced as you go.

The program offers 22 sessions of material (one per week, or whatever best suits your circumstances) and equipping to go beyond the 22 sessions so that discipleship can be a long-term pursuit. The formal meeting times are primarily used for collaborative inductive study of Psalm 119. (If that term doesn’t make any sense, don’t worry! It’s all simplified and carefully explained in the program.) During the sessions, a mother and daughter will be challenged to memorize and unpack scripture together, engage with questions that prompt intimacy and accountability, and enjoy one another’s company. And just for fun and to support that "as you go” piece of discipleship, I made sure to include things that would be seen often: a cute phone lock-screen based on Deuteronomy 6 and a coordinating temporary tattoo—until my tattoo supply runs out. (File that under things I never thought I'd say about discipleship.)

In this program, the process is simple, but simple doesn’t mean easy. You will likely have to wrestle through scripture and tough topics together. This shared space isn’t as breezy as matching hats, but it’s sacred. Grab a few cookies and colorful pens. Lean in.

I’ve been writing curriculum in one form or another for the past eight years, but I’ve taken special care not to coast on experience or lazily adapt adult content for students. Because I truly desire for this to be a valuable tool for traditional/spiritual mothers longing to maximize their role as disciple-makers, I’ve carefully partnered with trusted leaders and more experienced mamas and incorporated their wisdom. I am so grateful for all I’ve learned from them! One mama said this about her experience with her 10-year-old daughter:

“I have thrived off HER enthusiasm. She loves getting 1-on-1 attention from me. She loves different color highlighters. She loves finding words to describe how God is... We pray together. We read together. We talk to each other. We laugh. Oh my word...it's such a blessing that we've been missing out on! In less than 2 weeks, our relationship has grown. I wish I had had this with my mom. The blessings are indescribable.”

If you are looking for a way to simply incorporate scripture-rich discipleship into your relationship, Simple Discipleship for Ages 9-13 may be a great tool for you. Mama (spiritual or otherwise), she’s gonna be a little bit like you no matter what. It’s wise to intentionally put scripture at the center of your shared journey. (And also pretty pens. Seriously, don’t forget the pens.)

Note: I recommend my adult Simple Discipleship program for ages 14 and up. The program lists many adaptations that can be made for your specific situation and equips you to go beyond the program so that you can discipleship independently of programming. You can see more about that program here.

Some other helpful information that supports this approach and may interest you:

• Article on The Gospel Coalition: “Inductive study isn’t just for adults” by Shawna Duvall

• Jen Wilkin and Melissa Kruger on the TGC podcast: “Your teenager needs discipleship”

• Teach Your Teen How to Read Their Bible by Jen Wilkin (I was pleased to see how much of SD: 9-13 is aligned with this!)